The following gChat just happened. It proves, once and for all, I am a master of segues. That's just how it goes with me. One moment you're talking about dudes with a fear of commitment and then BOOM, vomit story!
E: either she'll say yes
or she'll say no and it will be over
the dithering... that's bad
me: yes
shit or get off the damn pot
E: i was like "she won't care if there are diamonds that you are in michigan"
me: hahaha
true. for each diamond you get one "get out of jail free" card.
one diamond? you get to go to michigan and she won't care
two? michigan AND you can drunkenly mention that her best friend is hot and she can't get mad
and so forth...
E: haha
me: you must have been restraining yourself from just yelling it
E: i know
me: i had that situation today. but I didn't restrain myself
on the way home this woman was on the train with her kid
and the kid starts to puke EVERYWHERE
and not just once. like again and again and again.
so we get to the next stop, and she tries to stay on the train
and a woman says "ma'am, maybe you better get off until he feels better." and she says, no, I'd rather not."
E: really?
me: and I just look up and say very calmly "Miss. Your boy just vomited on my shoes. I like these shoes. You should get off the train. Like right now."
and away they went!
and now my sneakers are in the washing machine..
E: the pumas?
Yes. Well not my Pumas, my Converse. Which sucks as I hardly wear them and I was trying to change that. That wee little bastard and his regurgitated GoGurt. One, what kind of mom lets a kid have a GoGurt at 7:30am? Two, what the hell is GoGurt?
Monday, March 16, 2009
Thursday, March 5, 2009
Tie-pocalypse Now
Okay, so honestly, I have no words for the hideousness contained above.
Maybe not so honest. I love this tie because it is so wonderfully, out-of-this world bad. Not badass mind you, just bad. As in the designer who is responsible for this should be given a medal and then promptly shot. Because ugliness on this scale requires skill.
Comments about this tie from co-workers:
"Omigod it hurts to look at."
"Did you make your rug into a necktie?"
"Dude, something ugly died on your shirt."
"It's so ugly it's beautiful. And then it moves past beautiful, right back into ugly."
If only the knot wasn't so out of place color-wise!
Original Price: 36.50
C21 Price: 12.00
Sale Price: 9.00
Monday, March 2, 2009
An American Tragedy
So being that I clearly don't have enough to keep me busy, I've entered into a literary pact with my BGE. We're working our way through the 100 Greatest American Books in alphabetical order. My first assignment was "An American Tragedy," by Dreiser.
Now before I post my reaction/thoughts to this 600 page saga, let me begin by saying this: I can honestly see why people would think this is a great book. Dreiser is very, very good at developing his main character Clyde, and although you make some rather abrupt jumps forward in time, you almost feel like you grow up with the guy.
I don't want to post too much, as it'll ruin the book for my partner in crime, but I'll air two complaints. First, most of the other characters, as opposed to Clyde, are weak and interchangeable. Now I can already hear a defense in the manner of "Well perhaps Dreiser was trying to portray the characters as Clyde, in his self-centered manner, saw (or failed to see) them." I disagree. I think Dreiser simply aimed very high insofar has the scope of the novel. He pulled some things off well, others, like this, not so well. Secondly, the pace of the book completely throws you at the end. And not in a good way. After 500 pages of Clyde whining, moralizing, shaking his hands at the heavens, worrying about his clothes and coming up with great pick up lines like "Oh you sweet, wonderful kid you!" the book drives you off a cliff of shock and into a deep bay of hopelessness and terrible metaphors (like these!).
In the end the book reads like a warning or a very scary episode of Davey and Goliath. Basically, if you chase booze and women and let yourself fall into fast life of nice clothes and an office job, you will die by electrocution. In all seriousness, I think Dreiser was positing the opposite of the clean, earned by the sweat of your brow American Dream in the form of Clyde's downfall.
Next up, Appointment in Samarra. Only like 98 more until I can read Watchman for the 50th time! Woot!
Now before I post my reaction/thoughts to this 600 page saga, let me begin by saying this: I can honestly see why people would think this is a great book. Dreiser is very, very good at developing his main character Clyde, and although you make some rather abrupt jumps forward in time, you almost feel like you grow up with the guy.
I don't want to post too much, as it'll ruin the book for my partner in crime, but I'll air two complaints. First, most of the other characters, as opposed to Clyde, are weak and interchangeable. Now I can already hear a defense in the manner of "Well perhaps Dreiser was trying to portray the characters as Clyde, in his self-centered manner, saw (or failed to see) them." I disagree. I think Dreiser simply aimed very high insofar has the scope of the novel. He pulled some things off well, others, like this, not so well. Secondly, the pace of the book completely throws you at the end. And not in a good way. After 500 pages of Clyde whining, moralizing, shaking his hands at the heavens, worrying about his clothes and coming up with great pick up lines like "Oh you sweet, wonderful kid you!" the book drives you off a cliff of shock and into a deep bay of hopelessness and terrible metaphors (like these!).
In the end the book reads like a warning or a very scary episode of Davey and Goliath. Basically, if you chase booze and women and let yourself fall into fast life of nice clothes and an office job, you will die by electrocution. In all seriousness, I think Dreiser was positing the opposite of the clean, earned by the sweat of your brow American Dream in the form of Clyde's downfall.
Next up, Appointment in Samarra. Only like 98 more until I can read Watchman for the 50th time! Woot!
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